People In Glass Houses Now Being Advised They Can Throw Stones

After years of being told if you resided in a glass house you should not throw rocks for fear of breaking windows, it now appears this adage has been debunked. Boffins at the University Of Kabul have confirmed, in a recent study, that it is highly likely any thrown stones would likely just bounce off with a comical *tink* noise.  At worst, it might make a bit of a clatter.

The study was undertaken over 4 years in 701 glasshouses all over the world.  Varying sizes and shapes of rock were used, and a wide array of subjects who were tasked with throwing said ballast were employed to ensure a thorough study

After collating and analysing the data, it was established that the likelihood of you damaging the glass was limited.  During the test, only 31% of glass was damaged with 15% showing very obvious damage and could officially be labelled as “broken”. This was all dependent on a number of factors including glass type, size of “house”, strength of thrower, and atmospheric conditions. For example, if you were Geoff Capes in a cheap, low grade B&Q greenhouse, you could shatter the entire frame and network of windows with a simple hoik. If, however, you were Pee-wee Herman and lofted a pebble in an orangery, you’d be unlikely to even reach the glass.

What this tells us is that scientists study all sorts.  If they want to study this shit, then fine by me because whatever it is, it expands the mind.  Who cares what it is you are learning as long as you are learning. What it also tells us is that we should take on board what we hear, and digest ourselves, and not blame others for our own decision making.  If I want to go in a glass house and throw a stone, I go in knowing the risk.  I do not blame others for telling me it’s fine. Also, I do not blame others for me missing out on the particularly joyful act of throwing stones merely because I was advised the risk of breaking glass increases should you throw a stone in a glass house.

I advise you all to find a glass house, pick up a stone and make decision. Go on, I dare you.